Your thoughts, your words, what you say to yourself, how you see yourself, how you perceive yourself, and your actions towards yourself all has an impact on your health and wellbeing.
"I JUST" - negative self talk and its implications to your health
It was brought to my attention recently, when I was coaching some students, that the word "JUST" kept coming up as a way to be critical of ourselves. These are stories or phrases that we all sometimes use about ourselves. We might say -
"I just need to get it done",
"I just need to eat the right thing",
"I just need to make myself do..."
"I just need to be stronger.."
"I just need to....."
...and it's not actually a nice or kind way to respond to yourself.
And so, my curiosity is what is underneath the word "JUST". Why are we am I (or we) putting that much pressure on myself/ourselves?
Take action to be kinder
Next time you get cross with yourself and say "I JUST need to..." I invite you to consider; What would it be like to take a step back and look at the situation from a different point of view? Take this opportunity to notice:
How are you talking to yourself?
Would you talk to other people like that?
How harsh or unforgiving are you on yourself?
Once you have noticed this, I also invite you to consider:
Do I have the resources to get that task done now? To change that behaviour? Or do I need a helping hand? Do I need support or more information from another party to be successful?
Are any of my body systems in overwhelm and if so, is expecting myself to "JUST" do [it] realistic? Or could I do it in five minutes, maybe in 10 minutes and give myself a moment to catch up?
Can I be okay with the fact that I didn't respond immediately to the text/email? That I choose to get out of bed later and prioritise my health? Can I be OK if "I JUST didn't make the right choice"?
This is all part of a learning curve to be kinder and more gentle to yourself. Changing the way we talk to ourselves can make a huge difference to our health and wellbeing. We need to change the habit of talking harshly to ourselves, and that is not always easy.
Some people may able to put into place a change of habit really quickly and really effectively, for others it may take a little bit longer. Be kind to yourself if you don't immediately succeed in changing your self talk - but it's important to make the change.
If you need help achieving change whether that's to your health, habits or life changes, take a look at my 121 coaching:
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